To be moved to the new 'In(Sight)' page.
I'm almost there.
We've all heard the stories; they show up on the evening news, on the front page of newspapers, and as headlines in the weekly tabloids: the Olympic sports hero who falls from grace after being accused of injecting steroids: the TV evangelist who gets arrested for soliciting prostitutes; the school teacher who carries on an affair with one of her students; or the baseball star who gambles on his own games.
Our society is rampant with acts of self destruction that leave most of us perplexed and asking "Why did he or she do that? Why did I do this? How could this happen? Self-sabotage is the proverbial hammer over the head that finally wakes us up, demanding that we pay attention. For most of us, it takes somethingdevasting to crack us open, to get us out our minds and into our hearts. It takes the painof a broken heart and shattered dreams to push us beyond the limited realities we have created for ourselves.
We are spiritual beings whether we want to admit it or not, and inherent in our DNA is a design to return us home-home to our true essence, our greatest self, our limitless self. One of the ways we consciously ensure our return is through pain. Pain is the greatest motivator for change. It is the spiritual crowbar that pries open the door to new realities. Would we look into our deeper selves, dwell in them, grapple with them, inquire into them and initiate change in our lives if everything was perfect? More than likely we would justcontinue living day by day in the comfort of our familiar worlds.
Self-sabotage is a catalyst that we can change our world in an instant. We can go from arrogant and blind to humble and open-in just a matter of seconds. The pain we cause ourselves is a tremendous spiritual gift. When explored and understood for its true purpose, the pain of our own self-sabotage reveals new and uncharted territories that can change the course of our lives.
The underbelly of the human psyche, what is often referred to as our dark side, is the origin of every act of self-sabotage. Birthed out of shame, fear, and denial, it misdirects our good intentions and drives us to unthinkable acts of self-destruction and not-so-unbelievable acts of self-sabotage.
Shame and denial feed our dark side for one simple reason. If we accepted our weaknesses, flaws, and shortcomings as a natural part of our humanity, we would have the ability to ask for help when were confronted with an impluse that we don't know how to deal with. We would recognize that these dark impluses-such as the urge to have sex with people other than our spouse, to take money that doesn't belong to us, or to lie in order to better position ourselves-are a natural part of our humanity that needs to be understood and embraced. But because these urges are left unexplored and unexamined, they get wrapped in shame and denial that kept hidden in the dark. And it is there that our shadow self, the unwanted and denied aspects of ourselves, gathers more power until a blow up is inevitable.
Every aspect of ourselves that we've denied, every thought and feeling that we've deemed unacceptable and wrong, eventually makes itself known in our lives. When we are busy building a business, creating a family, or taking care of those we love, when we are too busy to pay attention to our emotions, we habe to hide our dark impluses and shame-filled qualities, which leaves us at risk for an external explosion.
Why will some of us sacrifice our deepest desires, our dignity, and our dreams to satisfy an impluse that can destroy our lives and the lives of those around us? To understand why good people do bad things, we must begin by understanding the basic structure of our humanity, the psychology of the ego, and the duality that exists within every person on the planet. Acknowledging what it is to be a human being is a fundamental step in healing the split between the light and the dark. IF we don't understand the flaws and weaknesses of the human machine we well as its perfection and strengths, we will never be able to make peace with ourselves or end the internal war that has us commit outrageous acts of self-sabotage and suffer needlessly over the repetitive bad behaviours that ransack our lives.
Why must we acknowledge and understand the duality that exists within each of us? Because it is not our true self that takes us down the dark roads that rob us of our dignity and self-respect. It is not our more evolved self that sabotages our success and drags us through humilation and pain. It is in fact our wounded self, the part of us that is filled with hidden insecurities and shame. The wounded ego is the aspect of our humanity that by its very design is vulnerable to our darkest impluses and has the ability to wipe out our hard work and obiterate our dreams. It is the wounded human ego and the shadowy dark forces that lurk beneath the surface of our conscious minds the hiold the power to ruin our lives in an instant or drag us through a painful existence filled and failed relationships, bad business deals, disappointing outcomes, and stupid mistakes.
Party Animal into Geek
Ever since I got the Sony Digital Book, very much like Amazon.com's 'Kindle', the Kindle isn't available in Canada and Sony's Digital Book is. It's a new way of reading books digitally. Some people prefer the old fashion book, the smell and feel. But I'm hooked and addicted to this thing. I'm an electronic junkie. That's right, from party animal to big GEEK!
When I share the wealth of information I gain, whether it being directly from a book or in my own words, there's some great feeling within that sharing to others, sharing something of light that can give to other people, like myself, the 'a ha' moment. I am sure I'm not alone when reading something I get that understanding.
Friday, June 5, 2009